My routine was to get up, put on the kettle and go to the loo while it boils, make the coffee and climb back into bed to drink it. Within a total of about 10 or 15 minutes I would get directly into the shower and start prepping for work and that was that.
What happens when you wake up and realize you forgot to set up the coffee machine the night before and or the timer didn’t work correctly and your coffee was not ready to pour? You have to first put in the filter, fill up the tank, scoop in the coffee and switch it on. Then you wait for it to painfully drip through.
By that time you have gone to the loo and now wonder aimlessly around the kitchen waiting to get your coffee so you can go shower. ROUTINE! I simply can’t get into the shower before I have had my coffee, it just doesn’t feel right to me. I have tried, I just don’t feel the same and everything spirals downhill from there.
By that stage I have no more direction and I start feeling flustered and don’t know what to do next. By that time I am already running late and things start going south and the circus begins. Let’s not even talk about what happens when your alarm clock fails you.
It’s the same with babies and children. They need routine, however informal or formal it may be to guide them and encourage them into the next step for their day.
If it is always different then we can’t expect them to have any sense of direction really. It all boils down to stability and security for them and although not always perfect it does help a lot to keep the ship sailing smoothly.
A really simple example would be a preparation for bedtime routine. Now you may think that you already have one, and yes you probably do, but is the routine you have successfully directing your child to the next step, which is going to sleep? Are you keeping times and tasks simple, straightforward and repetitive each day? Does your child realize each step of the routine is directing him or her to the next step? It’s easy to say you have a routine but one of the simplest ways of it not reaching the payoff is if you don’t be strict about order and keep an eye on the clock.
By offering routine for babies and children we offer them:
1. A sense of safety & security.
2. We teach them much needed social skills and encourage healthy development including self-control.
3. When there are big changes in the household or their little lives for instance, routine helps to make the entire transition easier by bringing in the stability factor.
4. Routine can also strengthen the bond between parent and child and can reduce power struggles as the child becomes more inclined to need the routine and shows acceptance of it by figuring out the next step on their own, like saying after bath time that it’s time to get into bed now for a story.
5. As a first time parent I had no idea about routines for babies and children and I only wish I knew what I know now. A routine makes the transition into parenthood just so much easier. I don’t mean you need to be tasking and scheduling everything but just having a basic idea of how you would like to see things unfold and try where possible to incorporate your ideas into your new babies day, will help greatly to settle you and your new baby in the first few weeks. Later you can adjust where necessary to form new routines where needed.
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34 comments
I am ALL about the routine! I need it and so do my kids! Great points. 🙂
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