Did anyone ever tell you how messed up the first trimester of pregnancy is?!
It’s a lot like having a hangover after a very “awesome party” but for 24 hours a day!
Everything changes!
It’s as if your world turns upside down after you pee on that stick.
You want to scream from a mountain top that you are pregnant – you are excited, you are overwhelmed but you feel the need to hide it for the next couple of months because you are so scared about having a miscarriage – while trying to pretend everything is okay – even though you feel and look like crap!
I think this is the worst part of the first trimester – falling pregnant and not been able to share the good news with friends and family straight away. You automatically feel the need to stop going out because you run out of excuses for not drinking wine anymore.
The fear of having a miscarriage destroys the joy of finding out that you are pregnant for the first couple of months. You are literally counting down to week 12 to confirm that everything is fine and that your baby is healthy.
Is this because society has put it in our head that we shouldn’t announce before week 12 or is it because of family traditions and doctor’s orders?
I admit, I was sucked into this safe zone theory three times already and sometimes I wonder why I didn’t say anything before week 12 because it would have been great to go on this journey with fellow pregnant women who understood how I was feeling emotionally and physically.
I vowed to myself during my first pregnancy in the first trimester that I would eat healthy, exercise daily, dress smart and pretend as if everything was normal. Every time I fell short!
During my second pregnancy, I felt isolated, guilty, and anxious all the time. I was going through this difficult phase which made no sense to me because I wasn’t expecting it. It was completely different from my first pregnancy and not everything was mentioned in the pregnancy books.
They didn’t mention the part about how my loving husband would seem like an enemy to me and how his hugs and kisses wouldn’t be so comforting anymore.
The only special part about the first trimester is…
Finding out you are pregnant,
Finding out you can eat as much as you want,
Thinking about that bountiful cleavage you will get,
And celebrating the fact that aunty flo won’t be visiting you for the next couple of months.
The first trimester of pregnancy is a lot like a rollercoaster ride – its’ filled with physical, emotional and hormonal changes that can turn you from Cinderella to Cruella.
I don’t want to scare you… but I feel like I need to prepare you.
It’s not glamorous. It’s not pretty and it’s not easy.
It’s not all roses & unicorns for everyone – like some people claim it is.
You might find yourself curled up on the bathroom floor more often than you think.
Your hair might smell like vomit.
Dry toast might be the only thing you eat.
You might feel the urge to scratch your vagina at odd times.
You might fall asleep during a finance meeting.
You might want to punch the person who sprayed that strong perfume in the finance meeting.
AND
You might start hating the penis for putting you in this uncomfortable position.
The tiredness during pregnancy is overpowering, uncontrollable, and unstoppable and you can’t even have an extra shot of espresso to help you through the day!
This is my third pregnancy and by now, you would think I would be an expert at this but it never gets easy. Every pregnancy is different. Nothing can prepare you for the terror of constipation.
I think the first trimester is one of the most difficult parts of this new journey ahead. You are barely pregnant – you are still not sure that it’s for real and then you must deal with a whole lot of symptoms. And the worst part is that you are not even sure as to how long it will last.
The thought of thinking that this might be here for the next 6 months scares you.
It’s not what women talk about openly.
I’ve tried to hide the urge of wanting to scratch my vagina in public, it was hard… and soooo uncomfortable! I didn’t even know why that was happening until I googled “Vagina itching during pregnancy”.
You’re bloated, cranky, sleepy, and hungry but you can’t eat, sleep, smile or poop.
Your boobs are sore, your mouth tastes like crap and even toothpaste makes you want to vomit.
You will feel obligated to carry a pack of mints in your handbag.
You will have serious withdrawal symptoms from caffeine and you will end up forgetting about that one important thing that you had to do. Blame the pregnancy brain– nothing makes sense anymore.
Your gums might bleed.
Your hair might fall.
Your skin might break out.
You might be out of breath after a shower.
You might start hating vitamins.
AND
You might need to keep a doggy bag in the car for those emergency vomit sessions.
All of this is happening without you even looking very pregnant yet! All in the first 12 weeks, when you so emotional that you end up crying for a cat food commercial.
The ‘no bump’ first trimester makes you want to avoid the world for 12 weeks but it does end. The second trimester is a lot like having a house party and it will definitely make up for the daunting first trimester.
“I just wanted the glow. The one that they promise you on the cover of those magazines. Well, I’m calling it – pregnancy sucks. Making a human being is really hard. I have no control over my body or my emotions.”
-Wendy from What to Expect When You’re Expecting
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